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Pennylane9996
09-06-2008, 01:32 AM
I don't know who ,what , when or why but after a rocky summer with my surro Angela we finally had a happy update and were trying to look ahead.
All of a sudden just now at 1:20 AM I get a text message from Angela calling me a liar and saying people are telling her I said this and that about her.
I am a nervous wreck. At 11pm we were texting about our wedding
anniversary's & next thing I get is a venomous text from Angela saying she is tired of my lies , knows all I have said in the past and " she is done".
DONE !! That sounds and feels pretty scary to me right now. I keep texting asking what's up, who said what and what she means by done?
Done with speaking? OK say that. Done with allowing me to hear about
baby? That's been said before . Done with the pregnancy? I have no clue.
I kept trying to communicate for over an hour- no answer from Angela.
I got frantic and still am We have each had numerous things to say about each other and have both gotten PM's from " team Donna" or team Angela" people but I told Angela most of what was being said about her and most of what she was telling people about me.
We have tried to stay civil on the message boards and just had a decent visit.
Out of the blue someone contacted Angela ( or didn't ) and there is a major mess.
I'm sure this thread will be deleted or closed like every thread where I express my upset or defend myself.
I have been here for years and never been involved in such a mess after mess.
To whoever feels the need to stir up trouble you have no idea of the damage you are causing. To anyone who isn't an IP - you have no idea how scary and worrisome it is when your surro comes out of the blue with an evasive
but BITTER text and then won't call or answer you.
I have the disadvantage here. I have to worry about Angela's frame of mind right now and the stress and the future of the relationship.
I am the one who has been told I will be kept out of doctor visits and had
Angela call me telling me what stress is doing to hurt the pregnancy.
In a desperate move I just texted Angela saying I feel worried that her
mood is erratic , saying I need to please hear from her & saying I'm worried.
I went as far as to say I feel a local child welfare agency might need to get
involved for the protection of the baby ( horrible thing to say- worse thing to feel).
All I got back was Angela saying I'm going to bed, call who you want. Don't call me
This is out of control. Can certain people PLEASE stop adding fuel to the fire here> This baby has been in a lot of trouble for months and finally looks good & now I'm terrified about loss of contact of his safety due to stress or whatever. Like I said Neither of us ( Angela or I) have been perfect & we have vented to people but a 1am text saying " You're a liar, I'm done".
Again she & I can go on & on about things others have said to take sides or warn but I have a baby 500 miles from me with someone who just texted me that she's " done" and won't explain or be civil or calm.
I hope whoever decided to stir up crap can imagine how sick I feel right now.
When does it end & as a surro mom board - do you agree with freaking your IM
out at 1am and not explaining or communicating? I have said repeatedly please lets talk or email I'm scared. I'm now being ignored.
Thanks to whoever had fun with this . Like I said before ..YES we've had a lot of trouble & have each vented but it looked like a change was about to happen. I feel tortured and sick.

Pennylane9996
09-06-2008, 01:58 AM
Mods,

Please delete the thread above this. I have been threatened with law suit
for worrying and posting.

I don't know who ,what , when or why but after a rocky summer with surro but we finally had a happy update and were trying to look ahead.
All of a sudden just now at 1:20 AM I get a text message from a surro calling me a liar and saying people are telling her I said this and that about her.
I am a nervous wreck. At 11pm we were texting about our wedding
anniversary's & next thing I get is a venomous text from certain surro saying she is tired of my lies , knows all I have said in the past and " she is done".
DONE !! That sounds and feels pretty scary to me right now. I keep texting asking what's up, who said what and what she means by done?
Done with speaking? OK say that. Done with allowing me to hear about
baby? That's been said before . Done with the pregnancy? I have no clue.
I'm not slandering or saying names because I also got a text from this person saying she is looking to sue me. Sue me? Yeah, sue me for slander.
I think slander means something different- I am asking others to please
try to imagine to distress here . I am here for help and to explain what I have been put through by gossip.
I am only asking for communication because I am very worried right now.
Stress, anger, no communication.Worried about all that
I kept trying to communicate for over an hour- no answer from this person.
I got frantic and still am We have each had numerous things to say about each other and have both gotten PM's from " team her " or team me " over the months. I disclosed most of what I heard without saying names - just to clear the air as often as possible.
We have tried to stay civil on the message boards and just had a decent doctor visit. Things were looking up
Out of the blue someone contacted surro ( or didn't - I have no clue) and there is a major mess.
I'm sure this thread will be deleted or closed like every thread where I express my upset or defend myself.
I have been here for years and never been involved in such a mess after mess.
To whoever feels the need to stir up trouble you have no idea of the damage you are causing. You have no idea how scary and worrisome it is to be an IP when your surro comes out of the blue with an evasive
but BITTER text and then won't call or answer you.
I have the disadvantage here. I have to worry about surro's frame of mind right now and the stress to the pregnancy and the future of the relationship.
I am the one who has been told I will be kept out of doctor visits and had
been told what stress is doing to hurt the pregnancy.
In a desperate move I just texted surro saying I feel worried that her
mood is erratic , saying I need to please hear from her & saying I'm panicked.
I went as far as to say I feel a local child welfare agency might need to get
involved for the protection of the baby ( horrible thing to say- worse thing to feel).
All I got back was a text from this person saying" I'm going to bed,
Don't call me."
This is out of control. Can certain people PLEASE stop adding fuel to the fire here? This baby has been in a lot of trouble for months and finally looks good & now I'm terrified about loss of contact and for his safety due to stress .
Like I said Neither of us in my situation have been perfect & we have vented to other people but a 1am text saying " You're a liar, I'm done" after a good
week is weird & scary.
Surro & I have each gotten messages from others trying to help us or trying to make dram but I never, ever cut off contact and always scheduled a call when things got bad. I am being denied that now & it's horrible.I have a baby 500 miles from me with someone who just texted me that she's " done" and won't explain or be civil or calm. This is not a slanderous comment, it's a fact
and it's in my cell phone & it's 2 hours after a " la-di-dah" text.

I hope whoever decided to stir up crap can imagine how sick I feel right now.
When does it end??
As a surro mom board - do you agree with freaking your IM
out at 1am and not explaining or communicating? I have said repeatedly please lets talk or email.... I'm scared. I'm now being ignored.
Thanks to whoever had fun with this . Like I said before ..YES we've had a lot of trouble & have each vented but it looked like a change was about to happen. I feel tortured and sick. Just please lets all stop, I have a baby here that was not doing well for a very long time. This is grueling.

Looking2BGSinOR
09-06-2008, 02:01 AM
Holy $hit...are you serious? This is way beyond something I can even comprehend right now. I cannot fathom why anyone would feel the need to meddle so maliciously into a relationship that has NOTHING to do with them. They may feel they are being "angela's friend" by texting her what ever was said, but a true friend would think first about the stress it would cause for the baby..who is the ultimate innocent from this mess. It is obvious to me that this someone is out to do harm to more than your relationship with Angela. Who ever it is should be truely and utterly ashamed of themselves and remember that Karma is a b1tch.
I try to stay out of things like this here but wow...just wow. And of course who ever it was that did it, if they are on this board, would not have the balls to step up and confess that it was them or why they did it or even what was said because that would be too freaking honest...grow the F up.

hthompson
09-06-2008, 02:05 AM
Sorry about the drama going on... you're all 3 in my thoughts...

MyMiracle
09-06-2008, 03:13 AM
Wow, I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how stressed you must be...Angela, too...the baby, three. What an awful situation. I hope the two of you can ignore the crap people pull and work on your own PRIVATE relationship together. Hugs all around, and I truly hope things work out for everyone.

Lowboy Love
09-06-2008, 04:48 AM
I tried to call my IM after all her texts.
I also thought things were going well and then I got an email from a thread she posted telling horrible LIES about me.
And yes it is slander. Still I have not refused her contact. I have always followed doctors orders and done everything possible to give the good care that I will continue to give to the baby despite the drama she continue to cause in my life.
She is the one causing drama and lies not me. And calling child welfare on me because she is upset that I found out about her lies is ridiculous.
Also why is it that when I call her out in private about her lies she goes straight to the message board and posts more lies about me?
Because that's all she does, LIE! I'm sick of trying to be friends with someone who manipulates others and lies about me. When I said I was DONE, that's what I'm done with, the lies.
I want to continue to be civil and keep things off the boards. But I guess this is what she needs to do to try and make herself look good and gain sympathy when she's been caught.
I'm not bitter, I'm hurt.

And to the surros and IPs how would you feel if your IM or surro were doing this to you continually?
I really don't want to drag out all the times my IM broke our contract, refused to pay wages, or comp and allowance money, when the OB ordered me on bedrest.
The lies my IM told me with our last transfer in November. How I have been treated like garbage and with very little respect. The manipulations. Despite all this I continued to try and salvage what there was, and my IM continued to stir up as much drama as possible. I'm sick of the continued stress and Drama she creates and just want peace. I asked her multiple times not to create all this drama and she disregards my requests.
I really just want to have a peaceful pregnancy with no more of this.
Furthermore I have a great relationship with my FIPs. I have no drama in my past surrogacy, but my FIM does in her past surrogacy.
Also I wonder now, will comp be cut off again? Because I have stood up for myself. I am now on modified bedrest as per the peri's instructions. Will the wages be cut off? More drama created?
It really needs to stop.

BarbGSX1
09-06-2008, 05:12 AM
I have been through the exact same thing with my 1st IM!!!!!!!!!! If you need to talk, Angela please feel free to email me!! I did have to hire an attorney and the whole situation almost ruined my marriage and my sanity!!!! The best thing I could do was have absolutely NO contact with her and fax her my update after every OB appt. It was a mess!!!

Good luck to you all!!!

Barb :)

2+2surro
09-06-2008, 05:37 AM
Would it be possible to get a mediator for the two of you? You both have said and done some hurtful things. I believe these boards are where you should come to when you need to vent, but if you know the other is reading then some things shouldn't be said so not to hurt the other involved. You should vent to a friend or family member or a place where the other isn't involved. Sometimes we share things that seem to be minor to us but to the other they are huge.
I hope that you both can find a happy medium and think of the baby who needs his mama happy and his surro happy too. Good luck you two, get some sleep and just calm down and breath before you speak to each other. Each need to think how the other is feeling and consider being in their shoes.
Just my opinion of course.
Oh and for whomever sent the link, what do you feel you accomplished????

Starfish
09-06-2008, 05:39 AM
I'm sorry you have to deal with this, Angela.

OhioSurroMom
09-06-2008, 06:22 AM
Seriously, if you don't want more drama, why bring it to the boards? If you are that concerned about your surrogate & baby you would work it out *privately*, not come here and threaten her with family services because she caught you in lies.

I'd say good luck, but it sounds as if this relationship is beyond repair. I'd suggest maintaining email or text contact strictly about the baby and leave it at that. Everything else is water under the bridge and not necessary.

I agree 150% with Barb!!! Her situation was horrid - I remember it like yesterday (remember our marathon telephone conversations until 12-1am, Barb?!) and your sounds to be just about the same.

Hopefully, everything with the baby is well and will continue to go well for you, Angela! Keep your chin up and be strong - you don't deserve this!

Lowboy Love
09-06-2008, 06:22 AM
Furthermore I have a great relationship with my FIPs. I have no drama in my past surrogacy, but my FIM does in her past surrogacy.


I ment that my IM had drama and problems in her surrogacy with her FSM.
I never had drama with my FIPs. Any bumps that occured we (me and FIPs) worked out by talking to each other, not running to the message board and stirring drama. Like my IM has done to me for the 3rd time now.

Eskimo
09-06-2008, 06:50 AM
It really makes me sad that all of this continuously has to be broadcasted and discussed on a public message board.
That's all I have to say.

moms4ms
09-06-2008, 06:54 AM
I have to agree with Eskimo. Unfortunately, the last few times issues in your journey were brought to the board, the end result wasn't positive for either one of you. You can't "feel" or "read" people's emotions or context on a public internet message board. I think both of you need to keep ALL of this OFF the boards and deal with it in private. :(

sabrinaof4
09-06-2008, 07:22 AM
Big ((((HUGS))))) and prayers Donna! :praying: :praying:

Donna, let the lawyers handle everything.

I would only talk to the dr about how your baby is doing (that is if she signed the release form for you to have info about your baby) and cut contact with Angela.

I think it would be the best thing for you.

blessedinpa
09-06-2008, 07:37 AM
Geez, I JUST spoke with Angela a few days ago and she was very happy that things were going well, there was such a relief in her voice.....she was getting ready to have a doctors' appt, her IP's were going to be there and possibly spend some time together. She was very content and I didn't hear the stress level in her tone that I've heard in the past. I am shocked to read Donna's posting! I can only imagine how Angela's stress level has risen.... Angela, I'm not sure what is going on but I know you need this to stop for both you and the baby's sake. I am here if you need to vent. I hope nothing gets "cut off" from you now that you are defending yourself. I know how that just intensifies the situation. If you need to talk, I am here for you.

longbowswife
09-06-2008, 07:40 AM
I'm so sorry for both of you, I won't take sides because I don't know what's going on. I agree that now is the time to get a mediator involved. Many healing prayers to all.

ChiTwnMama
09-06-2008, 07:40 AM
wow ...just wow.........

if there was a smily-like face that had a jaw dropping from its mouth it would be posted in this post!

i am shocked and i am staying out of all of this!

SoleilBaby4Me
09-06-2008, 08:29 AM
I would have to agree with Michele in regards to the mediator....and that could be anyone. Angela, maybe you have someone that knows you well enough that would be able to speak for you when communication with your IM is necessary....the same for you Donna.

I will say that me and my IM had a bump or two in our journey....and it was solely b/c of NOT communicating well! And when I got emotional and could not speak on the phone, my husband did it for me. I knew the situation needed dealt with but I could not do it on my own b/c I was too emotional about it.

Anyway....I'm not going to take sides....I wish you both the best.

If nothing else, I hope you two find a way to deal with the mess for the baby's sake.

JennyLou
09-06-2008, 08:31 AM
I think if it's possible, a neutral mediator should try and get involved. Does your clininc offer anything like that?

I really want to stay neutral on this and offer some constructive ideas. I know that Angela has a LOT on her plate and I also KNOW that she would NEVER do anything to hurt that unborn baby she is carrying! I hope that you can take comfort in that Donna.

You both have big hearts and I hope that you can come to a compromise and at least a civil relationship to finish out the surrogacy. I'll be praying for all involved -- since it seems that there are so many of you! :grouphug:

musky
09-06-2008, 09:08 AM
It really makes me sad that all of this continuously has to be broadcasted and discussed on a public message board.
That's all I have to say.


Totally agree!! This is a terrible mess that needs to be rectified without outside interference!!

KAJEWELL
09-06-2008, 10:05 AM
this is all getting very old!!

Pennylane9996
09-06-2008, 10:07 AM
Those of you who actually think I ran to the message board over getting caught in lies are way off base. Way off. I ran to the board after 2 hours of texting and begging Angela ( approx 1am -3am) to call , write or text me.
She finally started calling my house close to ( or a bit after 3am) when I posted this.
Her few text messages were erratic and she would not elaborate at all.
She decided to listen to whoever stirred up drama at 1am and tell me she was done and I'd better not call her. I came here saying please stop the mud slinging. Go back ( please ) and read again. I did not talk about what Angela has put me through at all.
ALL wages have been paid in full and that includes lost wages from a time where Angela lied and didn't mention that she was bleeding for 3 days in June
when she was home & off from work. Then she worked one day & the bleed got worse at the end of her work day .I had to call my RE's staff and get 3 different stories about who she did or didn't call and the severity
of the bleed that had been going on for days.
I still pay lost wages and child care monthly. Since Angela wanted to talk lies please ask her about how many different doctors we have switched to because she runs away from anyone she can't get to comply with her wishes. We left my RE on poor terms because she was threatening his staff, now she wants to leave the OB because she doesn't like the nurse. The nurse , by the way, stays in exam room because the practice has heard so many different
statements and symptoms from Angela that each doctor feels one nurse needs to keep track and take proper notes. Simple as that- they want consistency.
I have gotten emails from people on a private message board saying she's been delusional & erratic and she got banned due to venomous posts and
mud slinging. I have gotten emails from people who ask me to call them or offer to forward Angela's emails to me.
I don't entertain this. If I have called any of you about Angela please call me out on it. On the other hand she is on the computer day & night and
buying into this drama. I have texts and emails where she talks about suing me and about not allowing me into U/S appointments- still I have mainly
remained quiet on the public board. Like I said when I do post the thread gets shut. There have been numerous inconsistencies on her part as to her condition & the risks to the baby.
When I hear from the OB or hospital doctor or the peri the story will always differ from what I hear from Angela. It's been ridiculous at times but I have never confronted her in the middle of the night & then shut her off.
I came to SMO partly to call out the gossip hounds and partly because Angela
will always try to " save face" here but will rant , rave and make threats in
our private relationship.
We did plan a good visit and did have a good visit. If Angela felt lied to she just needed to write or set up a call time and talk calmly to me.
Instead she texted that I was a liar and she was done, said I " knew" what I did and not to call her. It really was literally 2 hours after we were texting about marriage and all was well.
To me that's not OK behavior .
I said I threatened child welfare because I was worried about the welfare of the baby. I did not call. I just needed to hear from Angela & to have Angela know I was scared.
I repeatedly texted saying I was scared and we needed to talk about her behavior and what she was so upset about .
She responded with a text saying She would sue me & was going to bed.
She wasn't a shrinking violet /victim. She was fine until info got here.
The " threatened miscarriage" in July happened a day after Angela went on
a rampage texting me and carrying on. Yes I am worried about erratic behavior and stress. Who wouldn't be? One night she spent hours texting
about her July lost wages ( it was still July - they weren't late and some had been paid). Next morning she's hemorrhaging at a local emergency room.
I am panicked when she goes on a rampage & last night was out of the blue after a nice week.
Again, I didn't come here talking about much except the events of this mornings texts. Take a look at how rarely I post, this is because I almost always get calls and arguments from Angela when I do post.
Last week I posted the fact that we had a peri appt on Tuesday and Angela spent the entire day saying I violated her rights & insisting that I get the date off the board. Her motives for wanting info off the board were worse than you can imagine. I was not the one to post when we lost a twin or when there was a threatened miscarriage and when I do post an appt date I get slammed all day ( I was at the appt and it was a peri to look at baby).
As for former IP's & former surro's..me & my former GS are fine. She comes to NY, I go visit her. She will post if anyone needs. We had a rough patch but worked it out. If Angela believed I was so hard on my last GS she wouldn't have matched with me. We can each go on for pages complaining but bottom line is I didn't freak out over lies, I freaked out over erratic behavior after
a supposed renewed relationship. I certainly didn't rant about anything since our last visit and I also thought things were looking up.
At 1am Angela decided to be snide and erratic and started calling me liar & not saying what was going on . NOTHING.
I didn't call a child welfare agency, I said I would ( please read again) out of panic because I tried for over an hour to have Angela write me or explain. My thread was to those who feel the need to stir up drama. Angela is quick to jump on the money issues & the FGS issues , I just wanted her to call or write after her furious text.
I wasn't caught in lies , I don't even know what the heck was said. She wouldn't answer me & somewhere in here is the person(s) who caused all this after a good update and a good visit. I said nothing negative to anyone after this visit & I too believed all was looking up. I have no idea why Angela & whoever were stirring up trouble at 1am but I wish Angela had just talked to me told me what upset her rather than just saying she was done and stating
drama after a nice visit. Things could have changed but they never will if you go around digging up dirt .

Mom3boys
09-06-2008, 10:10 AM
Donna...I would do whatever you have to do to protect that baby. Be it 24 hr watch. How very scary for you.

Lowboy Love
09-06-2008, 10:23 AM
Those of you who actually think I ran to the message board over getting caught in lies are way off base. Way off. I ran to the board after 2 hours of texting and begging Angela ( approx 1am -3am) to call , write or text me.
She finally started calling my house close to ( or a bit after 3am) when I posted this.
Her few text messages were erratic and she would not elaborate at all.
She decided to listen to whoever stirred up drama at 1am and tell me she was done and I'd better not call her. I came here saying please stop the mud slinging. Go back ( please ) and read again. I did not talk about what Angela has put me through at all.
ALL wages have been paid in full and that includes lost wages from a time where Angela lied and didn't mention that she was bleeding for 3 days in June
when she was home & off from work. Then she worked one day & the bleed got worse at the end of her work day .I had to call my RE's staff and get 3 different stories about who she did or didn't call and the severity
of the bleed that had been going on for days.
I still pay lost wages and child care monthly. Since Angela wanted to talk lies please ask her about how many different doctors we have switched to because she runs away from anyone she can't get to comply with her wishes. We left my RE on poor terms because she was threatening his staff, now she wants to leave the OB because she doesn't like the nurse. The nurse , by the way, stays in exam room because the practice has heard so many different
statements and symptoms from Angela that each doctor feels one nurse needs to keep track and take proper notes. Simple as that- they want consistency.
I have gotten emails from people on a private message board saying she's been delusional & erratic and she got banned due to venomous posts and
mud slinging. I have gotten emails from people who ask me to call them or offer to forward Angela's emails to me.
I don't entertain this. If I have called any of you about Angela please call me out on it. On the other hand she is on the computer day & night and
buying into this drama. I have texts and emails where she talks about suing me and about not allowing me into U/S appointments- still I have mainly
remained quiet on the public board. Like I said when I do post the thread gets shut. There have been numerous inconsistencies on her part as to her condition & the risks to the baby.
When I hear from the OB or hospital doctor or the peri the story will always differ from what I hear from Angela. It's been ridiculous at times but I have never confronted her in the middle of the night & then shut her off.
I came to SMO partly to call out the gossip hounds and partly because Angela
will always try to " save face" here but will rant , rave and make threats in
our private relationship.
We did plan a good visit and did have a good visit. If Angela felt lied to she just needed to write or set up a call time and talk calmly to me.
Instead she texted that I was a liar and she was done, said I " knew" what I did and not to call her. It really was literally 2 hours after we were texting about marriage and all was well.
To me that's not OK behavior .
I said I threatened child welfare because I was worried about the welfare of the baby. I did not call. I just needed to hear from Angela & to have Angela know I was scared.
I repeatedly texted saying I was scared and we needed to talk about her behavior and what she was so upset about .
She responded with a text saying She would sue me & was going to bed.
She wasn't a shrinking violet /victim. She was fine until info got here.
The " threatened miscarriage" in July happened a day after Angela went on
a rampage texting me and carrying on. Yes I am worried about erratic behavior and stress. Who wouldn't be? One night she spent hours texting
about her July lost wages ( it was still July - they weren't late and some had been paid). Next morning she's hemorrhaging at a local emergency room.
I am panicked when she goes on a rampage & last night was out of the blue after a nice week.
Again, I didn't come here talking about much except the events of this mornings texts. Take a look at how rarely I post, this is because I almost always get calls and arguments from Angela when I do post.
Last week I posted the fact that we had a peri appt on Tuesday and Angela spent the entire day saying I violated her rights & insisting that I get the date off the board. Her motives for wanting info off the board were worse than you can imagine. I was not the one to post when we lost a twin or when there was a threatened miscarriage and when I do post an appt date I get slammed all day ( I was at the appt and it was a peri to look at baby).
As for former IP's & former surro's..me & my former GS are fine. She comes to NY, I go visit her. She will post if anyone needs. We had a rough patch but worked it out. If Angela believed I was so hard on my last GS she wouldn't have matched with me. We can each go on for pages complaining but bottom line is I didn't freak out over lies, I freaked out over erratic behavior after
a supposed renewed relationship. I certainly didn't rant about anything since our last visit and I also thought things were looking up.
At 1am Angela decided to be snide and erratic and started calling me liar & not saying what was going on . NOTHING.
I didn't call a child welfare agency, I said I would ( please read again) out of panic because I tried for over an hour to have Angela write me or explain. My thread was to those who feel the need to stir up drama. Angela is quick to jump on the money issues & the FGS issues , I just wanted her to call or write after her furious text.
I wasn't caught in lies , I don't even know what the heck was said. She wouldn't answer me & somewhere in here is the person(s) who caused all this after a good update and a good visit. I said nothing negative to anyone after this visit & I too believed all was looking up. I have no idea why Angela & whoever were stirring up trouble at 1am but I wish Angela had just talked to me told me what upset her rather than just saying she was done and stating
drama after a nice visit. Things could have changed but they never will if you go around digging up dirt .

If you wanted to work things out, they why did you come here? Why do you continue to say all these lies? I can back up and already have all that I've done and I can prove the number of times you broke our contract.
Why did you tell a bunch of lies while you were out here seeing me and then come to my house and act like we are friends?
This is 2 faced backstabbing behavior. When I got upset about it you post on the message board instead of owning up to what you have done.
I am disgusted that you continue to do this.
As far as OBs, I realized what's going on, you are manipulating and lying to both my OB and me. That's not going to happen anymore. I have no motives here other than to keep things private, and off the message boards. To have a good pregnancy. You have not. You continue to spew lies, disgusting.

mommajones
09-06-2008, 10:25 AM
I think you both need help. Someone neutral to get into the middle and sort the feelings out. Im thinking that so much drama is created off the boards by people who have nothing better to do with their lives than play with someone elses feelings.

Im sorry to both of you. I don't know either one of you personally and really have NO CLUE what is going on.

I wish you both the best and hope that for the sake of that child, you can learn to deal with the problems. Stop listening to everyone else for a moment and LISTEN TO EACH OTHER. Obviously there are problems...major ones. That need to be worked out.


And Jackie----sorry to hijack the thread---but here is a smiley for you:

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/6236/shockedsmileyzn3.gif

Starfish
09-06-2008, 10:28 AM
Give it up Donna and GROW up!

kanbangirl
09-06-2008, 11:18 AM
Donna - Have you noticed that STILL after all of this... Angela has still not come here and posted her side of the story. There are HUGE issues in this relationship that she has tried to continue to keep private even though you are trampling all over her. She is more a woman than I because I would have been posting away if I were her. This is crazy. She is angry and hurt by you and tells you she doesn't want to talk...At 1 in the ....and instead of waiting for things to pass or perhaps emailing her about your concern, you come her and post this???? C'mon...seriously.

sabrinaof4
09-06-2008, 11:25 AM
Donna...I would do whatever you have to do to protect that baby. Be it 24 hr watch. How very scary for you.

:agree: :agree: :agree:

sabrinaof4
09-06-2008, 11:30 AM
Donna - Have you noticed that STILL after all of this... Angela has still not come here and posted her side of the story. There are HUGE issues in this relationship that she has tried to continue to keep private even though you are trampling all over her. She is more a woman than I because I would have been posting away if I were her. This is crazy. She is angry and hurt by you and tells you she doesn't want to talk...At 1 in the ....and instead of waiting for things to pass or perhaps emailing her about your concern, you come her and post this???? C'mon...seriously.

I don't think she is trying to keep "private" as you put it. I don't even believe that one of her friends contacted her about someone saying Donna had said something. I think she made it up just to get attention.

She is trying to manipulate the situation because she is literally holding Donna's baby over her head.

I just hope Angela's future IPs see this and all of the other threads.

I'm guessing this one will get closed soon.

kanbangirl
09-06-2008, 11:34 AM
I don't think she is trying to keep "private" as you put it. I don't even believe that one of her friends contacted her about someone saying Donna had said something. I think she made it up just to get attention.

She is trying to manipulate the situation because she is literally holding Donna's baby over her head.

I just hope Angela's future IPs see this and all of the other threads.

I'm guessing this one will get closed soon.

Just out of curiousity...Have you ever heard Angela's side of the story...I mean from her, not from Donna or someone else? Is it the least bit possible that you have it wrong? I am not saying this to be mean or anything like that, I am just wondering if you think it may be possible at all, that you do not have the whole story?

OhioSurroMom
09-06-2008, 11:41 AM
Donna - Have you noticed that STILL after all of this... Angela has still not come here and posted her side of the story. There are HUGE issues in this relationship that she has tried to continue to keep private even though you are trampling all over her. She is more a woman than I because I would have been posting away if I were her. This is crazy. She is angry and hurt by you and tells you she doesn't want to talk...At 1 in the ....and instead of waiting for things to pass or perhaps emailing her about your concern, you come her and post this???? C'mon...seriously.

:agree:


I'm guessing this one will get closed soon.
I'm sure it will since Donna requested it in her 2nd post.


Just out of curiousity...Have you ever heard Angela's side of the story...I mean from her, not from Donna or someone else? Is it the least bit possible that you have it wrong? I am not saying this to be mean or anything like that, I am just wondering if you think it may be possible at all, that you do not have the whole story?

:agree: There is far more to this "story" and situation than being posted here. I commend Angela for not posting all of the gory details on a public message board - certainly is eye-opening!

Pennylane9996
09-06-2008, 11:46 AM
I tried to call my IM after all her texts.
Yes, you texted at 1am and ignored my texts BEGGING you to tell me why you were angry until 3am. You could have answered me at 1am and said -
" let's talk, I heard some nonsense about us".

.I also thought things were going well and then I got an email from a thread she posted telling horrible LIES about me..
So this is you trying to keep peace? You get an email about me and go nuts telling me you are done and not saying why and
not answering me over a supposed thread ? where is this thread ? Is this worth the anguish you caused me?

.
When I said I was DONE, that's what I'm done with, the lies...
I asked repeatedly what you meant by DONE. I told you I was panicked about your mood.
You wouldn't answer & you have cut contact off in the past.

.I'm not bitter, I'm hurt....
No, no, no. Your texts were angry & nasty and not called for.
You were bitter and enjoyed the fact that I was begging you to call , write or explain what was wrong.

.And to the surros and IPs how would you feel if your IM or surro were doing this to you continually?....
Doing what? We had a good visit, good week and then you get an email from a 3rd party and go into a rage. I did what to you?
Didn't you do this to yourself? Or better yet didn't whoever spread rumors do this to you?

I really don't want to drag out all the times my IM broke our contract, refused to pay wages, or comp and allowance money,
when the OB ordered me on bedrest.
I don't owe any monies at all. You love to say I owe you wages, you've done
it before & it's not true and I was cut off & threatened in July for not paying July wages when the month wasn't over.
In July I wrote you a check at lunch after we JUST found out we lost baby B because you were put out of work that week.
You have gotten all wages and monies and you know it. As for bed rest you switched doctors each time you were taken off bed rest.
Twice you switched when you were written back to work. I continued to pay

Despite all this I continued to try and salvage what there was, and my IM continued to stir up as much drama as possible.
I'm sick of the continued stress and Drama she creates and just want peace...
WE hung out and had a good week & stayed in contact and got along after this visit. At 1am this morning you are cutting me off and ranting because of 3rd party
crap and you call this YOU trying to salvage a relationship? You drummed up this drama. We did have past problems & talked all week about a new start then you go wacky
on me at 1am without explanation? Yeah, thats you trying to salvage a relationship. OK. Great

I am now on modified bed rest as per the peri's instructions. Will the wages be cut off? More drama created?
It really needs to stop. Wages have never been cut off & you created drama at 1am .Hmmm, I guess I wonder will the bleed get worse now
because of stress you created? Will you call the OB or peri and say I can't have any info on baby as per a screaming message from you?
I hope not. I just want the baby to be OK & this fight at 1am was not brought on by me at all !!
I wrote to Angela personally & this is the last time I will post on this thread. This is huge hypocrisy. Angela wants peace & no drama
but entertains someone's crappy gossip and starts a huge fight with me after
things were looking up for us. Yes I did hope we started anew . If I don't answer more accusations it's not guilt on my part. I'm
tired of the lies about me and can't possibly set each rumor straight.
Again, please stop the gossip. Look at the mess
someone caused by repeated ( or supposedly) repeating info just to hurt others.

kat110
09-06-2008, 11:55 AM
Oh my gosh, this is a train wreck and needs to be off a public board.

2boys1princess
09-06-2008, 12:03 PM
It really makes me sad that all of this continuously has to be broadcasted and discussed on a public message board.
That's all I have to say.

You said it best!

I'm somewhat new to SMO and am not familiar with any of the drama being talked about, but it sure is sad, sad, sad!
No offense, but this is one of the reasons I chose to work with two men....the less drama the better!!! :) :spin: :)

Kymztwinz
09-06-2008, 12:07 PM
I'm closing this thread per Donna's request.

That said, Donna, I do ask that you keep this off the boards where it belongs. Speaking objectively as someone who knows little about either side of the situation I have made these observations:

You have repeatedly blown the private situation between you and Angela wide open on the boards, then recant and say you don't understand and don't want the drama. By my observations, whatever has been going on privately between you and Angela has only been brought forth publicly and openly here on the boards after you brought it here.

Case in point - in this very post you publicize a new problem then immediately ask that it is closed. Those actions deliver the message that you want to publicly have your say, but don't want people discussing it. You can't have it both ways. You can't start drama as a means of stopping it.

I'm not taking sides on the personal issues here as it's beyond my scope and not my place to determine who is "right" or "wrong." But in the interest of maintaining the peace on the boards, Donna, I ask that you refrain from continually rekindling the public discussion and "drama" about what is going on in your journey with Angela. You both have people who through private communication support both of you; I think that discussion needs to remain in the background and not brought to the open limelight.

Jen.CT.surro
09-06-2008, 12:07 PM
Oh my gosh, this is a train wreck and needs to be off a public board.

I agree.... not the place.

SherryT
09-06-2008, 12:08 PM
Donna,

One problem I see with threads such as this one is that they fuel the fire for even further drama. Whatever is going on between you and Angela should be handled privately between you and Angela, and not played out on the boards.

It sounds like this has not been the best journey for either of you so far. I hope the two of you are able to work things out. Life is too short . . .